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<rss xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" version="2.0"><channel xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom"><title>Laugh Out Loud!!</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/</link><atom:link xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" rel="self" href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/feed/rss2/posts/"/><description></description><language>en-EU</language><generator>MokoFeed</generator><ttl>10</ttl><image><title>Laugh Out Loud!!</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/</link><url>http://data5.blog.de/design/preview/8e/c45d253b3c355679ccedbe1b5b14b7_160x200.jpg</url></image><item><title>Random crap</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/12/random_crap~2075968/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-12:/2007/04/12/random_crap~2075968/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 12 Apr 2007 06:50:36 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Mister: &lt;/strong&gt;Kung gagawa ako ng pelikula, gusto ko, ako si ZORRO!&lt;br&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;Misis:&lt;/strong&gt; Eh ako, sino?&lt;br&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;Mister:&lt;/strong&gt; Si DACOS!&lt;br&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;Misis:&lt;/strong&gt; Dacos? Sino 'yun!&lt;br&gt;
&lt;strong&gt;Mister:&lt;/strong&gt; DA COS of all my ZORROs!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Job interview...&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Boss: Ano ang alam mo?&lt;br&gt;
Rommel: Alam ko po kung saan kayo nakatira ng misis mo, at kung saan nakatira ang kabit mo.&lt;br&gt;
Boss: Tanggap ka na!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Tomas: Sobrang tabatsoy na ang misis ko kaya gusto niyang magbawas ng timbang. Nag-horseback riding siya...&lt;br&gt;
Jorge: Ano'ng resulta?&lt;br&gt;
Tomas: Nabawasan ng 10 kilos 'yung kabayo!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Ama: Kumusta ang pag-aaral mo?&lt;br&gt;
Anak: Nag-lesson at test po kami tungkol sa mga manok.&lt;br&gt;
Ama: Ano, madali ba?&lt;br&gt;
Anak: Chicken na chicken!&lt;br&gt;
Ama: Anong grade mo?&lt;br&gt;
Anak: Itlog po.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Dalawang holdaper sa bangko...&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br&gt;
Holdaper #1: Yehey! Mayaman na tayo!&lt;br&gt;
Holdaper #2: Bilangin mo na!&lt;br&gt;
Holdaper: Gago! Alam mo namang mahina ako sa math. Abangan na lang natin sa balita kung magkano!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Guro: What is 34 books + 25 books?&lt;br&gt;
Pilo: 59 books po.&lt;br&gt;
Guro: Good. Ang 18 + 29 + 30 books?&lt;br&gt;
Pilo: 77 books.&lt;br&gt;
Guro: Very good. Now, what is 950 + 136 + 672 + 490 + 854 books?&lt;br&gt;
Pilo: Ma'am, library po!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Pasyente: Okey ba ang services sa ospital na ito?&lt;br&gt;
Doktor: Oo naman. Sigurado 'yon.&lt;br&gt;
Pasyente: Paano kung hindi ako satisfied?&lt;br&gt;
Doktor: Ibabalik namin ang sakit mo.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;After 50 years...&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Urbana: Mare, how's your sexlife?&lt;br&gt;
Dolores: Well, sa age ni pare mo, MUKHA na lang ang nagagalit,&lt;br&gt;
BALAHIBO na lang ang tumatayo at UBO na lang ang matigas.###&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Mga kasabihan:&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;"Magkasinlakas lang ang muscles namin ni Pacquiao, pero hindi talaga ako ang kalaban niya, bakit ba ang kulit ninyo?!" - VINA MORALES&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Anong akala mo sa akin, mayaman?! Nauubusan din ako ng pera!" - ATM&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"You never even thanked me for making you happy, then you throw me away just like that... I hate you for using me, for making my life full of shit..." - TOILET PAPER&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Huwag po nating salubungin ang mga bumababa. Hindi po natin sila kamag-anak." - LRT OPERATOR&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;" Napaka-unfair ng buhay sa mundo... Bakit hindi ako pwedeng magmahal?!" - UKAY-UKAY&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"You know, I feel I'm relaxing...you know... Thanks for da God... To all Filipino, thanks for da supporting wid me..." - MANNY PACQUIAO &lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Biktima rin ako ng abortion." - BALUT&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Alam kong may gusto ka sa akin. Pasimple ka pa. Bakit hindi mo ako seryosohin? Pero bago ang lahat, gusto ko, alam mo na hindi ako easy-to-get. " - FLAT 1.0&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Huwag mong sabihing pinaiyak kita dahil una mo akong sinaktan." - SIBUYAS&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Panakip-butas lang ba talaga ako?" - PANTY&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Halika, pag-initin mo ako! Kailangan kong pumutok upang ako'y iyong matikman at ika'y masarapan... ayaaan na! Malapit na!!! Puputok na!!!&lt;br&gt;
Aaaaahhhh... ." - POPCORN&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Huwag mo akong sisihin kung cold man ako dahil hindi naman ako magmamatigas kung binigyan mo lang sana ako ng konting importansya! " - KANING LAMIG&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Hindi lahat ng alak, nakalalasing. " - ALAK-SAN&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;"Hindi lahat ng 13, malas." - 13th MONTH PAY&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/12/random_crap~2075968/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>classic</category><category>pinoy</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/12/random_crap~2075968/#comments</comments></item><item><title>If Women Rule the World</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/if_women_rule_the_world~2038269/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/if_women_rule_the_world~2038269/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 14:11:33 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;Received these images over email.  It's ridiculously possible! &lt;img src="/img/smilies/graybigrazz.gif" alt=":P" class="middle" border="0"&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;br&gt;
&lt;img src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/237/447139088_cf3e71b967.jpg?v=0" alt="bath" title="bath"&gt;&lt;br&gt;
Who haven't heard the famous line..."do you know where the bathroom is?"&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;img src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/195/447139092_e3eda90e99.jpg?v=0" alt="hammer" title="knife"&gt;&lt;br&gt;
Shoe heels to hammer a hard nail head and knives to drive the screw in.  Literally.  No pun intended.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;img src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/218/447139096_e482d126a8.jpg?v=0" alt="toiletrim"&gt;&lt;br&gt;
Why do men have to lift those round thing anyway? Is the bowl hole too little to shoot their pee?&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;del&gt;&lt;/del&gt;
&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/if_women_rule_the_world~2038269/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>classic</category><category>images</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/if_women_rule_the_world~2038269/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Modest Bikini for Sunbathers</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/modest_bikini_for_sunbathers~2038065/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/modest_bikini_for_sunbathers~2038065/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 13:28:20 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;&lt;img src="http://www.jokeindex.com/images/cat_sunbathers.jpg" alt="kitties" title="kits" height="300" width="400"&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;From &lt;a href="http://jokeindex.com"&gt;Joke Index&lt;/a&gt;
&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/modest_bikini_for_sunbathers~2038065/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>images</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/modest_bikini_for_sunbathers~2038065/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Ang Tagalog sa Davao</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/ang_tagalog_sa_davao~2037640/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/ang_tagalog_sa_davao~2037640/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 12:09:12 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;
Got this article from an email.  Enjoy, Dabawenyos! *lol&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;How can one distinguish a Davaoeno from a Cebuano? Or from a Cagayanon? Difficult? Easy.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Davaoenos are some of the most unique people in the world. We can easily stand out if we are placed in a crowd of Filipinos from other parts of the&lt;br&gt;
country. And how, you say? Language.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Davao City, aptly called the melting pot of cultures,is home to many dialects. Tagalog, Cebuano,Ilonggo, Ilocano, Chavacano, Moslem, Bicolano.Name it, we’ll speak it. If the Filipino language is a compositen of all the dialects and languages in the&lt;br&gt;
Philippines, you might as well say that the language we speak in Davao City is the real Filipino language, and not Tagalog.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;However, since it is a hodgepodge of different tongues, it is sometimes funny to hear our language “bastardizing”, for lack of better word, the other dialects. Strangely, that distinguishes us&lt;br&gt;
from the rest. Try these.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;In stating a fact, Manilenos say, “Talagang mabait si Weng.” In Davao, we say. “Mabait bitaw gyud si Weng”. Too assertive? One asks, “Ano nga `yong pangalan mo?”. In Davao we say, “Ano gani `yong pangalan (or worst, ngalan) mo?”. When somebody commits a mistake or surprises someone, we never fail to say, “Halaka!”. Duh.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;We are fond of re-constructing the language. There’s the GI+ verb, such as,”Gisabi kasi ni Helen na mag-absent si Bernard bukas”, or “Giganon ni Lalai si Belinda sa mukha”. You’ll never&lt;br&gt;
find “ginanon” in any dictionary, I swear to God.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;There’s the KA+ adjective, as in, “Kaputi gyud ng mukha ni Yang-yang” or “Kapayat gyud ni Jason ngayon.”&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;The MAKA+ verb form, such as, “Maka-inis talaga si Albert, uy!” or “Maka-uwi talaga ako ng matagal ngayon”.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;The NAG+ verb, as in,”Nagsabi kasi si Tita Prescy na pupunta daw tayo ng airport” or “Hindi pa man siya nagdating, uy!”&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Adding new words or new meanings to old words to the dictionary is one of our favorite past times.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;NAKIN: “Alam man nakin `yan ba!”, “Saan nakin kita nakita gani?”.&lt;br&gt;
KU-AN: “Ku-an daw ang gawin mo”, “Si ku-an kasi ano masyado”. (No sense at all.)&lt;br&gt;
ANO: “Na-ano ka diyan, Bryan!”, “Ano man yan siBryan,uy!”.&lt;br&gt;
HA: “Lake-ha na ng tiyan ni Lulu uy!”, “Gwapa-ha niya uy!”&lt;br&gt;
BEH: “Sige daw beh, dare!”, “Pakipasa daw ng ballpen ni Tzaris beh”.&lt;br&gt;
KAY: “Huwag na, Wowie, kay nandito naman si Norma”, “Umupo ka muna kay nasa-CR pa si Elma.”&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;To express disgust over someone, we utter, “Gago kaba diay para maniwala sa kanya”, or “Ano man yan siya uy!”, or “Maka-inis man yan siya, uy!”, or when pestered when doing something, you’d&lt;br&gt;
quip,”Huwag lagi ba!” On the other hand, when we praise somebody’s extra special deed or talent, our Davaoeno tongue slips words like,”Kuyaw lagi `yan siya!”, “Galenga niya uy!”, “Ayusa niya&lt;br&gt;
uy!!”, “Kuyawa ni Orly uy!” or “Hindi ako makatu-o sa gigawa niya!” . Hay, makatawa talaga. Ooops!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Of course, there’s the classic, “Gisabihan na bitaw kita na huwag kang tumabok,nagtabok ka man din. Ayan tuloy, naligsan ka na! Pastilan! Anuhin na lang natin yan ngayon?”&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;There are just so too many words to mention. Just check out the words you spew everyday. Sometimes you just laugh at yourself when you realize that you’ve just said those very words. No matter how long you stay in Manila or in the States, the moment you’re back to Davao, your tongue feels as at home as you do. Language is&lt;br&gt;
the very soul of every being. You just can’t do anything about it. Or as how we say it,”Anohin man natin yan?”&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/ang_tagalog_sa_davao~2037640/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>pinoy</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/ang_tagalog_sa_davao~2037640/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Math Magic</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/math_magic~2037633/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/math_magic~2037633/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 12:08:06 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;Try to compute this:&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Your mobile phone’s last # x 2,&lt;br&gt;
Add 5, x 50, Add your age + 365 minus 615.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;The last 2 numbers is your age and the first digit is your cel’s last number.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Amazing, isn’t it?&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/math_magic~2037633/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>odd-finds</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/math_magic~2037633/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Cinderella's Chuva</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/cinderella_s_chuva~2037630/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/cinderella_s_chuva~2037630/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 12:07:23 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;If Cinderella’s glass slippers perfectly fit, why did it fall off along the way?&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Maybe it was done on purpose to attract the prince.  In short, nag-inigat siya!!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;*peace Cinderella*&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/cinderella_s_chuva~2037630/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>pinoy</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/cinderella_s_chuva~2037630/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Gloves Gone</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/gloves_gone~2037625/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/gloves_gone~2037625/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 12:06:35 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;By Carol Gilby&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Leaving a restaurant after meal with her husband, my friend realized she had forgotten her gloves. She hurried back to the table and, unable to see them, dropped to her hands and knees, lifted the tablecloth and peered under the table. Just when the waiter approached and said, “Excuse me, Madam, but the gentleman is over there, by the door.”&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/gloves_gone~2037625/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>classic</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/gloves_gone~2037625/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Binoculars Out</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/binoculars_out~2037617/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/binoculars_out~2037617/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 12:05:14 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;Driving on a solitary stretch of a California highway, a friend found himself keeping company with a formidable chain-link fence along the left side of the roadway. Heavily reinforced with razor-sharp barbed wire, it apparently surrounded a government installation. Many miles later he noticed an enormous white sign too far away to read. Curious, my friend pulled to the side of the road and tool out his binoculars.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;“Private Property,” the sign read. “Use of binoculars strictly prohibited.”&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/binoculars_out~2037617/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>odd-signs</category><category>classic</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/binoculars_out~2037617/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Two Nuns</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/two_nuns~2037603/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/two_nuns~2037603/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 12:03:02 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;There were two nuns..&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;&lt;img src="http://hakakak.humorousblog.com/files/2007/03/nun_run.thumbnail.gif" alt="two nuns" title="nuns"&gt;&lt;img src="http://hakakak.humorousblog.com/files/2007/03/nun_hustle.thumbnail.gif" alt="nuns" title="nuns"&gt;&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: It’s logical. He wants to rape us.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most! What can we do?&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: It’s not working.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: Of course it’s not working. The man did the only logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM : So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I’ll go this way. He cannot follow us both.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;So the man decided to follow Sister Logical. Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried about what has happened to Sister Logical. Then Sister Logical arrives.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn’t follow us both, so he followed me&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM : And?&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL : The only logical thing happened. He reached me.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: Oh, dear! What did you do? SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SM: Oh, no! What happened then?&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;SL: Isn’t it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man with his pants down.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;And for those of you who thought it would be dirty, Say two Hail Marys!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Of course, you know, Im just kidding ^_~&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/two_nuns~2037603/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>comic-strips</category><category>classic</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/two_nuns~2037603/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Government Aid?</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/government_aid~2037567/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/government_aid~2037567/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 11:56:44 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;&lt;img src="http://hakakak.humorousblog.com/wp-inst/wp-content/blogs.php?file=2007/03/CheneyReed.jpg" alt="Government aid" title="govt aid" width="400" height="300" align="middle"&gt;
&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/government_aid~2037567/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>comic-strips</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/government_aid~2037567/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Heights</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/heights~2037544/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/heights~2037544/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 11:53:37 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;height of poverty:&lt;br&gt;
wife stitching husband’s condom&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;height of innocence:&lt;br&gt;
a girl applying clearasil to her nipples thinking they are pimples&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;height of ambition:&lt;br&gt;
an ant climbing on the leg of elephant with a motive of rape&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;height of unemployment:&lt;br&gt;
a spider web found in a prostitute’s pussy&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;height of laziness:&lt;br&gt;
naked man sleeping on top of a naked woman expecting an earthquake to do the rest.&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/heights~2037544/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>bar-jokes</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/heights~2037544/#comments</comments></item><item><title>On A Weekend</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/on_a_weekend~2037535/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/on_a_weekend~2037535/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 11:52:10 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;Willy, a mental patient, mimes driving a car as he runs around the halls of an asylum. An orderly turns the corner and asks Willy what he’s doing.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Willy replies, “I’m going to Chicago for the weekend.”&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;The orderly chuckles and enters another patient’s room and catches Bob pleasuring himself.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;When asked what he is doing, Bob replies, “I’m screwing Willy’s old lady while he’s away in Chicago.”
&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/on_a_weekend~2037535/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>bar-jokes</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/on_a_weekend~2037535/#comments</comments></item><item><title>American In Mexico</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/american_in_mexico~2037530/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/american_in_mexico~2037530/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 11:51:04 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;There was this American tourist in Mexico, and he was getting tired of walking around, so he went up to a donkey rental place and said, ‘’Can I rent a donkey?’&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;The guy said, “We don’t call them donkeys here, we call them asses. This is the only ass I have left, and you have to scratch him when you want to make him stop.”&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;The guy rides his ass for a while, sees a hotdog stand, and asks for a hotdog. The vendor replies, “We don’t call them hotdogs here we call the wieners.”&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Meanwhile his donkey is wandering away, so he goes up to another tourist and says “Will you hold my wiener whille I scratch my ass?”&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/american_in_mexico~2037530/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>bar-jokes</category><category>classic</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/american_in_mexico~2037530/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Rong Sfeling Rong!</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/rong_sfeling_rong~2037507/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/rong_sfeling_rong~2037507/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 11:47:43 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;Pupil:  Ma'am, unsa na'ng Cheken fox?&lt;br&gt;
Teacher: English na siya sa manok na gikaon sa irong buang!&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Pupil: Kanang bird flu ma'am?&lt;br&gt;
Teacher: Ay, kabugok gyud nimo oi... past tense na sa "bird fly!"
&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/rong_sfeling_rong~2037507/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>pinoy</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/rong_sfeling_rong~2037507/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Pichay, Itanim sa Senado!</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/pichay_itanim_sa_senado~2037493/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-04-05:/2007/04/05/pichay_itanim_sa_senado~2037493/</guid><pubDate>Thu, 05 Apr 2007 11:45:00 +0200</pubDate><description>	&lt;p&gt;Kung pangarap mong mahalin ka ng isang taong mamahalin ka ng tunay at di ka lolokohin....&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Text mo si Prospero Pichay!&lt;br&gt;
Pangarao nyang tuparin yang pangarap mo...
&lt;/p&gt;
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/pichay_itanim_sa_senado~2037493/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>pinoy</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/04/05/pichay_itanim_sa_senado~2037493/#comments</comments></item><item><title>Love Letter from the Gutter of my Hypothalamus</title><link>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/03/31/love_letter_from_the_gutter_of_my_hypoth~2007054/</link><guid isPermaLink="false">tag:outloud.blog.co.uk,2007-03-31:/2007/03/31/love_letter_from_the_gutter_of_my_hypoth~2007054/</guid><pubDate>Sat, 31 Mar 2007 07:05:50 +0200</pubDate><description>	
&lt;p&gt;This is a letter from one bar girl to another bar girl whose boyfriend she&lt;br&gt; apparently stole. This was found in a Malate bar by a friend of the guy who&lt;br&gt; sent me this e-mail. Enjoy it as much as I did!!!&lt;br&gt; Actual letter found in a bar in Malate:&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;To Marjie,&lt;br&gt; I am not surprise or wander why Dennis leave you. Why? What reason you can&lt;br&gt; think about but you&amp;rsquo;re very fat body. I&amp;rsquo;m thought before that Dennis only&lt;br&gt; use me to his toy but sooner and later I&amp;rsquo;m realize that he really can&amp;rsquo;t not&lt;br&gt; beared or stomached to be with you anymore because at first, Dennis say he&lt;br&gt; could not stand you&amp;rsquo;re habit of making pakialam all his walks and always&lt;br&gt; calling to their house what time he go home or this or that and then he say&lt;br&gt; he get ashame to met you iether in school or in his family an d then asking&lt;br&gt; you to exercise you&amp;rsquo;re very, very, very fat body but you hate it you&lt;br&gt; thoughth you&amp;rsquo;re the most prettiest girls he know about what do you think&lt;br&gt; you are &amp;ldquo;Beautiful Girl&amp;rdquo; of Jose Mari Chan even you are beautiful face (to your&lt;br&gt; think) you do not have the rigth to called me whatsoever or else different&lt;br&gt; name one time or the other for the real purposed to insults my personality&lt;br&gt; because I&amp;rsquo;m never call you names before iether in front of Dennis or in the&lt;br&gt; backs of Dennis, but if you start already to calling me different name, I&amp;rsquo;m&lt;br&gt; don&amp;rsquo;t have any other choice but to called you other different name to like&lt;br&gt; you are a PIG, FAT, OBESSED, OVERWIGHT AND UGLY SHAPE girl. Shame to you&amp;rsquo;re&lt;br&gt; body that is to a BUDING. You can&amp;rsquo;t not blame Dennis for exchanging you to&lt;br&gt; me because I&amp;rsquo;m am the more sexier than you when you look to us in the&lt;br&gt; mirror. I&amp;rsquo;m repeat again that you are like Ike Lozada when she is a girl.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;FROM: THE SEXIEST GIRL OF D.M.&lt;/p&gt;
	&lt;p&gt;Ps. You say that I&amp;rsquo;m the bad breathe&lt;br&gt; But who is Dennis want to kissed.&lt;br&gt; Me or you? You or me?&lt;br&gt; And the final is me. &lt;/p&gt;
         
&lt;p&gt; &lt;small&gt; &lt;a href="http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/03/31/love_letter_from_the_gutter_of_my_hypoth~2007054/#comments"&gt;Comments&lt;/a&gt; &lt;/small&gt; &lt;/p&gt;</description><category>classic</category><category>pinoy</category><comments>http://outloud.blog.co.uk/2007/03/31/love_letter_from_the_gutter_of_my_hypoth~2007054/#comments</comments></item></channel></rss>
